"Leave Them with Their Dignity"

Aah, this one feels good. I hope others feel that way about me. I am learning to take good care of myself... however, we are not an island. Life will pass us by as we isolate and stay away from our loved ones who we "think" do not want to be with us. Is it time for courage and prayer in moving forward in a loving way? Are other's hearts healed enough to reach out now in Love? The following is an eHarmoney report on how I engage with other people...





Positive Responses Others May Have Toward You



Many people, perhaps the majority, will come to appreciate your balance as a compassionate person. The more they get to know you, the more they will admire your thoughtful compassion for others and its compliment in the sensible ways you take good care of yourself.

Those whom you help will appreciate the way you leave them with their dignity by expecting them to collaborate in their own rescue. Those who are more tender-hearted will find in you a balance they lack; when they've run out of energy because they fail to take good care of themselves, you will still have enough compassion left to lift others out of trouble.

Even the tough-hearted, those who believe people should solve their own problems, might come to admire your tenderness which they don't find in themselves. So the people you help will be grateful, and the people who see your balance between self and others will admire you. Certainly, balanced is not bad at all as a way to be known among your friends."





Just walking on that "tight rope" balancing...

I'm Stuck in the Middle ... with You

Being a libra is not easy sometimes. I have learned from the "school of hard knocks" that no one is going to come riding up on a white horse and save me. I've had to tell myself, "No one is coming to help me. I have to get out of this by myself."

I've turned to God in those times. God has always come through with others sources of help and different people. Most of all I have been filled with the power and strength to keep perservering through the "hot" times in my fire storms of life. The following does seem to reflect on what I have learned for myself. (an eHarmoney report: engaging other people)

I also have had difficulty in knowing how far to go to help other people. This report seems to explain how they may have felt as a result of my behavior towards them. It may explain the resentment that has developed in others as a result of my behavior.

This helps me to be more mindful of how my family and friends "feel"... how THEY feel inside when we interact. This helps me to be more sensitive to others.... Compassion is the ability to put oneself in other's shoe's and consider how they feel, think, see, act, etc. Then I have an opportunity to step up and be there for them, in a way that THEY would like to be approached and helped.

Also, the "hardliners" have counseled me to be even harder on others. I just cannot and will not do that. I have thrown too many people away and I have been thrown away. I have been on the bottom and needed a hand up and I've been the hand up. I will never throw anyone away, ever. If I can help and am given the power and strength to help others... then I will do so. However, I will not do it at my expense anymore... and so it is.

Also, consider what is sensitive, compassionate true help... to give help to someone in a way that they really need. Not to walk away and be done with them, but take their hand and walk with them....


"Negative Reactions Others May Have Toward You


For people who are ruled by tender-hearted compassion, your more diplomatic response to problems might seem too cool, too focused on fairness and not filled enough with sympathy and selflessness.

For them, when someone's life is on fire, what is needed is not collaboration but rescue. And the person who experiences their life on fire may resent the time you take to contemplate. 'I need you, and I need you NOW! This isn't about fairness, it's about the fire.' 'All deliberate speed' may seem too deliberate and not fast enough, either to the more compassionate or to people in genuine trouble.

At the other end of the spectrum of compassion, those who believe people should take care of themselves may find even your thoughtful sympathies too soft. They expect people, themselves included, to work their own way out of trouble. They are convinced that the helping hand you lend just fosters dependence and is not good for the development of character, either in you or in the person you assist."


Just walking on a "tight rope", "stuck in the middle" with you....

I am Important and so are Other People...a personality report

This seems to be right on... I have learned these things from the "school of hard knocks".



"A General Description of How You Interact with Others


You are important. So are other people, especially if they are in trouble. You have a tender heart, but you know how to establish and keep personal boundaries. You are empathetic and compassionate, but you also believe that it's best if people solve their own problems and learn to take care of themselves, if they are able.

You are deeply moved by the needs of others, but you know that if you don't take good care of yourself, you'll wind up being of no use to anyone. So yours is a thoughtful compassion. You strive to be fair and sensible, taking care of others while also taking care of yourself.

When someone really is in trouble, you like to collaborate with them toward a solution; they do their part, you do yours. You consider carefully, and respond in a sensible way; they do their part, and together you move through the difficulty.

You seldom act impulsively; rather, when a problem arises, you take your time to think through the situation. This contemplative quality usually means that you'll arrive at a diplomatic solution, one that's fair for the other person and also fair to you. It's frequently a win/win situation."



I seem to have "come a long way, baby".

Independence and My Desire to Reach Out

I must have grown up according to this eHarmony personality report. These description of myself sure feel good. If I look inside, they seem to be right on. I hope you take an opportunity to take those tests for free and have fun getting to know where you are on your spiritual journey. Then share them with me. I would love to applaud you in your growth and understanding.



"The following describes how you engage with others; illustrating the dimension of your personality that determines your independence or your desire to reach out and touch others in meaningful ways.

You are best described as:


TAKING CARE OF OTHERS AND TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF

Words that describe you:


Fair
Considered
Collaborative
Responsive
Sensible
Diplomatic
Contemplative
Indulgent
Rational"

Well, thanks for the applause...